What About Those People You See Every Stinkin' Day?
We all work with people, don’t we? Some we see every stinkin’ day, and the success of our business rests on wholesome relationships. This means that irritating habits and dysfunctional forms of communication need an upgrade at times, or the workplace becomes a hockey field, and productivity is the poor puck being bandied around. Relationship issues need to be addressed. One third of all employees get so frustrated over office relationships that they feel like jumping ship. That loss of continuity costs time and money and never resolves the underlying problem.
What are these issues? They mayseem petty, but they aren’t! Top work issues include things like irritatinghabits (popping gum), working with a know-it-all, having someone share too muchabout his/her private life, loud personal phone calls, control issues, a teammember who has no clue what is going on, office bullies, drama queens…all thosevexing behaviors we’ve encountered throughout life. The difference isimportant: you are monetarily tied to the behavior. Simply walking away may notbe an issue. Instead, you may be forced to deal with the problem…and it’s notalways easy!
Alwaysbegin with a positive attitude. Huhman, in a GlassDoor article, also suggestedignoring flaws and finding common interests. A dose of direct, honestcommunication may be more helpful. Visit over lunch and share things you bothmight do to improve work relationships. Look around the workplace—there may beothers who are being impacted, at which point it becomes a group issue, not apersonal issue.
Sometimes there are underlyingissues. Find parallels in these vexing situations. For example, does a coworkerfeel inferior or feel the need to control situations? Realizing the dynamicsunderneath the action allows you to take compensatory action. Something assimple as including a shy person in basic decision making or making decisionsthe response of the team may change the nature of the problem.
Let’s look at four typicalexamples. Think of the Debbie Downer, who complains all the time. Youhave bad days too, and tolerating her barrage of negativity is just too much tohandle. It makes your own situation feel worse and colors your day. Go back tokilling her with kindness: offer positive feedback so over the top she shiesaway from you. It won’t take long for her to find someone else who will listento her complaints.
Think of Bully Bob. Perhapshe undermines your decisions or picks up on your vulnerabilities. Deal with himdirectly. Explain your issue. If he remains unresponsive it becomes an HRissue. Document his behavior and pass it on.
No one enjoys working with SallySlacker. She never does her fair share and leaves you to pick up her end ofthings to keep the company at peak performance. Realize that if you enable herbehavior, it will continue. Set firm lines of responsibilities at team meetingsor with your boss when given something to do. “What is my part, and what isSally’s?” It’s a fair question, and it will be hard for Sally to shirk her jobwithout it showing.
Gossipy Gladys is anotherworkplace problem. She knows the dirt on everyone and wants to share what sheknows. The solution is an easy one. Don’t listen. “I have work to do.” Turnaway. “I’m sorry, but I’m not interested.” Go to the restroom. Be very clear insetting your tolerance level, and be consistent. She will find anotheraudience.
It’s important to realize that yourworkplace is your home away from home, and it needs to be a healthy, pleasantenvironment. Tolerating poor behavior will never change the situation, but youdo have resources at your disposal. Use them!